07-17-2009 until 08-17-2020
Maid in Thailand
As we have grown, we have developed a defacto set of rules, but we’ve never published a specific set of rules. At this point, we are trying to make a list so people can be more aware of what kind of behavior is expected.
The Number One Rule: Be Polite and Open Minded.
Do not share pictures or any other materials from this site. Do not allow non-members to read this site. This is an absolute zero tolerance policy. You will be banned immediately and permanently. This includes sharing them with your best friend. It includes keeping a photo album of printed pictures. It includes showing them to people to show them that transition can be successful. It includes all sharing or reposting of any picture on this site. No exceptions. Absolutely zero tolerance ban for life.
Do not drag conflicts/drama from other transgender message boards into this one.
No Personal Attacks: Please keep discussions civil. Attacking other posters is unacceptable. Avoid the second person “you” and keep discussions limited to topics, not personalities. If you believe someone is wrong, critique their ideas, do not insult their person or intelligence. (Ie, “I do not believe that’s corret for the following reasons” is encouraged, “you are wrong because you are stupid” is not.) Note: the moderators and administrators are smart enough to suss out second hand insults, don’t think you can game the rules on this subject.
Do Not Deny People Their Identity: It is absolutely unacceptable to question someone's gender identity on this board. We can discuss a lot of issues having to do with our identities as transgendered people, but directly challenging someone's identity will earn you a very quick lifetime ban without any warning.
No Racism or Hate-Speech: Racism and the use of racist terminology is absolutely forbidden on this board. This is not subject to negotiation and will result in a ban without warning.
No porn/erotica/cheesecake: Please do not makes posts which are erotic in content or post pictures which could be considered pornographic or erotic, including ones that may be technically PG rated “cheesecake.” Detached academic discussion of sexuality is perfectly acceptable, but things meant to titillate are not. We have too many younger users and erotic discussions we want our reputation to be very clean if someone’s parents or guardian happens upon the site. Also erotic conversation will attract people interested in the site for erotic purposes, not for transition.
Do not quote pictures: If you wish to comment on someone’s picture, please do not quote the actual picture. If you quote it, they no longer have the ability to remove it should they decide they do not want it available to the public at a later date.
Please Use Descriptive Topics: If you start a new topic, please make the topic title an indication of what the topic is about. If you believe that someone at your place of work is discriminating against you, the correct topic would be ‘Discrimination At Work” not “Things suck” Most people don’t read every thread and descriptive titles really help them to find the information they’re looking for.
Political Topics Limited to GLBT Only: Political discussions on this site are limited to GLBT and gender issue topics only. As has frequently been noted, religion and politics are things that polite people don’t discuss at a dinner party. This is because these topics have the ability to divide people. Members of TS have a wide variety of points of view and we do not want someone to feel unwelcome because they have a different opinion on something entirely unrelated to transition.
Religious Topics: Religion is a difficult topic because so many of the anti-GLBT groups base their bigotry on religious excuses. Specifically religious topics, ones that deal with actual doctrine and dogma, the nature or existence of god or gods should be kept off of trueselves. Those types of discussions inevitably divide rather than unite people. Discussion of political groups that claim to base their views on religion are certainly allowed, but should remain focused on their political actions, not a debate about their theological views or the existence of God or bashing of religion in general.
Do Not Share Materials from TS: Very simply put, what happens in Trueselves stays in Trueselves. Do not copy posts, photos, or anything off the site. Do not give your account to anyone or allow them to use it.
No self-service moderation: if you feel a post is rude or offensive, the answer is to not take the person to task in public. Report the post and a mod will deal with it. Generally, telling someone their post is offensive or not allowed will simply invite them to respond. The result is usually a senseless tit for tat derailing argument which can only be solved by a mod stating directly whether something is acceptable or not. Please just report the post.
Do Not Copy Closed Topics: If a topic is closed, please do not create an identical topic in an attempt to evade the closure. If we are closing something, we have a very good reason for it. We also discuss closed topics and they are frequently reopened—particularly when someone is busy and closes a topic quickly to allow it to cool off. If you feel the closure was wrong, pm a mod or admin and make your case.
Moderation Complaints Belong in PMs: Please don’t take moderators and administrators to task in public threads. If you have a question or issue, PM us. Attacking mods in public places us in an impossible position because if we do decide that a decision was wrong, it makes it appear that we are being bullied into changing our position. There may also be additional information you aren’t aware of. Often a closed topic appears to be fairly benign because there have already been 10 posts removed for personal attacks and nastiness.
Language Policing: Many people here use progressive terminology of various types. Third gender pronouns, alternative spellings of woman, terminology that is considered more "polite." You are not mandated to do so, but do not police or attack them for doing so.
Name Changes: It is possible to change your name, please PM an administrator. Once you do this, the name will be changed without any further notice. So if you have difficulty logging in please make sure to try your new name.
Suicide & Self Harm: We try to help and support people here, but we are not a professional organization and we do not have the resources to deal appropriately with suicide attempts or self harm that endangers people. These topics have also, occasionally, become magnets for people seeking attention. For this reason threads indicating these things will be closed and information posted directing the user to the appropriate resources. If necessary any and all personal information will be turned over to authorities as appropriate.
Purging: While it seems to be more common in the past, many transitioners go through cycles in which they back off from transition and attempt to distance themselves from the community, dispose of any non-gender conforming clothing or other items, etc. This is called purging. Because of this phenomenon, and the gaps it leaves the forums in when an account disappears, it we will not delete accounts. If you don't want to be here, don't visit. If you cannot bring yourself to stop coming here, it is not our job to prevent you from doing so.